Male CCO to Female Executive Producer 

There is nothing worse than an ugly old woman putting her hands on you! 

"I need a massage. You know what I mean? In my room tonight. Make that happen" he said. Hmm.... not exactly in my job description and even after hundreds of location shoots, this was a first. So I called the front desk and arranged a massage for him. 
The next morning he came to breakfast in a rage. "Do you think that was funny? Sending that ugly old woman to my fucking room? There is nothing worse than an ugly old woman putting her hands on you! I aught to get you fired!" He was bellowing in his Southern drawl.